You're My Best Friend
by byrne14
Summary: Tom Kaulitz has known his best friend for years. They do everything together, know everything about eachother. But all this is about to change, now that they're older... and the world just doesn't understand the term 'best friends'. Crap summary!
1. Chapter 1

**Hey Fanfiction people! This is my first story on here, so I want constructive criticism please! I hope you enjoy it! :)**

**You're My Best Friend**

"Friendship improves happiness and reduces misery, by doubting our joys and dividing our grief. " - K.B Zimmerman

"No."

"Do you want to.. Uhh… maybe go out on Saturday, then?"

"Sorry….. No."

"Oh, okay. What about Sunday?"

"Can't."

"Monday?"

Too busy banging my head against a wall.

"I have plans that night."

"Doing what?"

"Uhhh…. Babysitting."

"Who?"

The first child I see.

"My cousin….. Scarlett."

I could feel her eyes burn through my skin. I was getting beat for that one.

"Oh, great! I love children!"

"Oh no! Not this one.. She's…. trouble." I risked a glance over at my best friend, who rolled her eyes.

"Then why don't we-

I slammed the phone down on the table with a loud sigh. To hell with that shit. It definitely wasn't worth it.

"Jeez, could you be anymore of an ass?"

"I'm not even sorry." I replied, flopping down on the sofa and leaning back, suddenly feeling out of energy.

"I mean, she's a slut and I don't like her, but was there a need to hang up like that?" The 18 year old girl on my bed asked.

"Yes! She wouldn't shut up. Her whiney voice was driving me crazy."

"Then why go out with her?" She retorted.

My head snapped up to look at my best friend lying across my huge, hotel bed. Her long, skinny legs were hanging over one edge, her head of long chocolate curls the other.

"I wasn't 'going out with her'." I explained.

She laughed, a big grin spreading across her upside-down face,

"No. You don't do that, I forgot." Her sarcasm was expected. It always was.

I rolled my eyes, letting my head flop back again.

"Dating's too messy. I only want one thing, commitment isn't that." I said my case, but it was pointless. She never understood my theory. She was into the whole 'love you until the end of time' thing.

"You know us American's have a word for that. It's called 'Man-Whore'."

Now it was my turn to laugh,

"Okay, one, you wouldn't know, cause you're not even American. And two, that's two words."

"I am American! And you get what I mean, no need to be a wise ass about it!"

My grin stayed put. I loved jabbing at her.

" Oh of course, how silly of me, another word for Polish _is _American_."_

The pillow hit me in the stomach quickly and with force. I was lucky that was the closest thing to her, and not a hammer… or a gun.

I sat up to see her doing the same, a pout on her red lips, which made me laugh even more.

Before we go any further, before things get too crazy, let me get you up to speed.

I'm Tom Kaulitz. I'm in a band, Tokio Hotel. We've gotten pretty big over the past couple of years, which is amazing, it's all I've ever wanted, really. But one problem tagged along with my dream, that problem would be the girl I talk to everyday, the girl I can make laugh with one twist of my face, the girl that's been my best friend ever since we met on a vacation in France at the age of six, when she asked me if I wanted to pet her turtle, Tom.

Scarlett Izabella Rosnovski didn't speak German, and I sure as hell didn't speak Polish, but we got by with the little English we both knew, and our parents translations. We spent the next week throwing turtle droppings at people in the pool, performing a special secret handshake every time we saw a yellow car, and poking fat people as the sunbathed. Ever since that fateful holiday, we have been best friends. Along with my twin brother, Bill, of course. But as we grow older, Bill seems to be the best friend Scarlett can go to too talk about clothes and food and vampires and unicorns - along with other ridiculous mythical creatures.

Whereas I'm the best friend that sits with her and is bored when she's bored, hugs her when she's sad and crying, laughs when she laughs. I'm the best friend that can't begin to imagine a life without her.

A lot of you reading this have probably already figured out my real feelings about Scarlett, but me, I took a little longer to realise….

**Pllleeeaaasssseee read and review!!!! It would mean so much to me!**


	2. Chapter 2

You're My Best Friend

**Here's chapter 2!!!!**

**"Who would ever think that so much went on in the soul of a young girl?"**

**- Anne Frank**

"Tooooooomm! Tom?! TOMMM!!!"

I stifled a giggle with my hand. She was funny when she was angry.

"Tom Kaulitz so help you God if you do not answer me-

Her threat was cut short when I jumped up from the bushes behind her, striking a ninja pose.

"AHHHHHH!" She jumped at least 3ft in the air and let out an almighty scream.

I laughed so hard at the look on her face, I had to hold my sides for fear they would rip open. Scarlett's

face got very red, very quick. Her eyebrows furrowed, and her lips pursed. I knew I'd gone to far…..

Suddenly I was running across the wide open, green field where we played everyday. Scarlett was hot

on my tracks, her face probably like thunder, but I didn't dare take the time to look back.

"I'll kill you, Tom!!"

"Wait! Scar, Stop! I'm getting a stitch!!" I gasped, clutching my sore stomach.

She laughed evilly,

"Your mine!" She yelled, taking a leap of faith, and landing right on her target….. Me.

We crashed to the ground with a thud. I coughed and panted as the wind was knocked out of me from the blow. I squeezed my eyes shut, waiting for my payback from Scar.

But nothing.

I opened an eye to see her standing in front of me, her hands on her hips.

"What?" She asked, frowning.

"Well?? Let me have it!" I exclaimed, shutting my eyes again.

She laughed,

"I'm not going to hurt you, idiot!"

My eyebrows shot up, "Why?"

She shrugged, "I felt kinda bad when you started hobbling along. I didn't want to make you any slower."

And with that punch she turned on her heel and walked away. I scrambled to my feet to run after her,

"I'm not slow!" I frowned, offended and slightly embarrassed.

Scarlett shook her head fiercely,

"No, no. Of course your not."

Great. She's making fun of me.

I stopped jogging along with her, causing her to stop and turn around.

" I'm not slow." I said more firmly and slowly, my frown tight. No way was I going to be called slow by a girl.

She rolled her eyes,

"Stop taking everything so personally, Tomi. I was kidding."

But wait. If she was kidding, why did she not unleash payback on me? I asked myself. I had realised

that girls had cooties when I was 5, but now, at the old age of 9, I realised that they are also difficult…

weird… unusual…. Annoying. Well, Scar wasn't annoying… but other girls were. She also didn't have

cooties. I realised _that_ when her hand accidentally brushed mine as we were giving Tom the Turtle a

bath. Although I spent the next few days writing a goodbye letter to my family and planning my funeral,

I shockingly survived my use-by date. After that I didn't squirm away from Scar's exposed skin, or

wipe down the remote after she used it. She was just another human being.

**Scarlett**

Tom lay on the ground in the sprawled out shape I'd tackled him in, his new blond dreadlocks covering

half of his face. He eyes were shut tight, he was waiting for me to do something.

But I couldn't.

I fiddled with my hands, before deciding to put them on my hips. I shuffled from foot to foot, and

finally Tom felt safe enough to open his eyes. He stared, I felt uncomfortable.

"What?" I asked. Was there something on my face? Did I smell bad??

"Well?? Let me have it!" He exclaimed, shutting his eyes again.

I couldn't help but laugh, he was so funny! And cute………..

No, Scarlett! Stop that! He's your best friend! And a _boy_! I thought.

"I'm not going to hurt you, idiot!" I tried to be casual, but failed.

Tom peeked up at me with one gorgeous brown eye,

"Why?" He inquired.

I shrugged, "I felt kinda bad when you started hobbling along. I didn't want to make you any slower."

My voice was even that time, yeah, that sounded pretty cool. I turned to walk away, I didn't want him to

see my face go red.

"I'm not slow!" He looked hurt as he scrambled up to me. Whatever girl spread the rumour that insulting a boy would get him to like you should be jailed.

"No, no! Of course your not." This was not how I had planned our conversation.

Tom stopped jogging, I took a deep breath and turned to him.

" I'm not slow." He was serious not.

I rolled her eyes,

"Stop taking everything so personally, Tomi. I was kidding." Please don't hate me now.

Now he looked confused. Why was he confused? I sighed inwardly.

Why did I have to fall in love with the strangest boy in Germany? And why, oh why, did he have to be my best friend?

* * *

Suddenly my eyes were open. I was lying down…. Staring at a white ceiling…….

It took me a moment to realise it was all a dream. And I was 19 year old Scarlett again, in room 506 of

The Hilton, New York.

I took a deep breath before pulling back the covers and jumping out of the comfy hotel bed. I went into

my unsuite bathroom and took off my plaid shorts and while tee to get a shower. It was the middle of

July, so the air was warm and the sun was bright. I loved the summer, and not only because that was

when Tokio Hotel got the most vacation days, but because I had always felt happier in the Summer. I

had only good memories of it. Whatever happened during the Winter, or Fall, was forgotten once

summer came around, when the sun would come out and make everything better……

I come from a rich Polish family. My father is a high-end lawyer. The best in Warsaw, infact. My

mother doesn't work, she shops and drinks, and then shops and drinks some more. Growing up with

money was easy, growing up without love was hard. When my father was home, he was 'too busy' for

Me, my mother had never cared for me, there or not. So when I met Tom and Bill Kaulitz, I didn't

Understand when they did something nice for me, or when I was invited into their home by their parents

And given food and friendly conversation. From the Kaulitz family I have learned a lot, which I why,

When I was 13 years old, I left Poland for Germany, where a better life awaited me. And now 6 years

Later, here I am, looking up at the 4 boys I spend my days with, messing around in a new city everyday,

Rocking out at night. This life is better, I tell myself everyday. This family is better.

* * *

"What goes on, ladies?" I strolled into my brothers hotel room, throwing two cans of Red Bull at him and Scarlett, who were sitting on the edge of the sofa, engrossed in the video game they were competing in. Bill's hit him on the head, but Scarlett grabbed hers, skilfully still able to shot the bad guys in the game.

"OW!" Bill yelled, his hand flying up to his Mohawk in protecting.

"Opps." I shrugged, settling myself down beside Scarlett, who's eyebrows were furrowed in concentration, her bottom lip sucked in.

"What's on the agenda tonight? " She asked.

I took a sip of my Red Bull,

"The usual."

Bill and Scarlett groaned simultaneously.

"I think I'm going to vomit." Bill moaned. Scarlett laughed in agreement.

"Your just jealous because this is what your night will consist of." I motioned to the game on the screen.

"Please! Zombie Patrol is better action than you'll get in a week!" Scarlett retorted.

"Whatever floats your boat, Scar. But if you don't mind I prefer my lovers _alive_."

We continued our playful spat, Bill snorting every time he found something funny.

**Scarlett **

I sat on the hard seat, twiddling my phone around in my hands, my gaze on the stage with the four boys, the pulsing lights, the electric sound ringing around in my ears. All this was so soothing… it was home to me. I tried to keep my eyes focused equally on all the guys, but I couldn't help it when they stayed on Tom for longer. Every time I caught myself staring, he was staring right back. Missing notes and everything!

I sighed…. He was worrying. I could see it in his eyes. God, why couldn't this all be easy? Why

couldn't I have my best friend love me in a simple way, without drama, without pain? No one else loves

me, can't you just let me have this one, God? Please?

**Tom**

I only want her. Please, God, can I have her? It's all I ask for.

Please?

**Okay, how was chapter 2?? It was longer, right? Please review!!**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"The only way to have a friend, is to be one." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

"_Flight 408 to London now boarding at Gate 7. Flight 408 to London now boarding at Gate 7."_

10 minutes later……

"_Last call for Flight 408 to London. Last call for Flight 408 to London."_

I could feel my ass going numb. We had been sitting on hard airport lounge seats for over an hour now.

Many holiday goers had come and gone, most in a hurry to get to their places, but we didn't move.

I looked at the seats around me. Gustav sat beside me, his legs neatly crossed with a thick, hard-backed book in his hands. Directly in front of me was Bill, his usually tall Mohawk was down and his bare, tired eyes were fixed on his large coffee cup that he had been gulping down like air.

To his left was Georg. He was sleeping with his head right over the back of the chair, loud snores coming out of his open mouth. Tom was to Bill's right. He was wearing his usual apparel of baggy jeans, a black tee and blue check shirt with black Nike's. He was sitting very still, not doing anything, really. So still, I wondered if he was alive. With the big black shades he had on, I had no way of telling.

"Tom?" I asked. His head snapped towards me.

Yep. Alive.

"Never mind." I waved him off. As he turned back to his original staring position of the empty seat beside me, I realised I had to be seriously bored to be questioning Tom's living.

Bill sighed into his coffee cup,

"What time is it?" He asked the room.

I checked my Blackberry,

"4:30." Am, that is.

They all moaned in response. Even Georg, who snored at the same time. We arrived at JFK airport at around 3am, and have been sitting here ever since. Our flight to Las Vegas was delayed and no one we asked seemed to know when it was changed to. I sighed, feeling hot and sticky in the New York summer heat. I could tell this was going to be a long day, and we weren't even on the plane yet.

**Tom**

I hate waiting. I hate sitting still. Yet I was doing these things very well. It was so early in the morning, I didn't even have to energy to shake my leg or get my ipod out of my back pocket. I glanced over at Scarlett, something I did when I was bored. I had my large tinted sunglasses on, so she couldn't see me taking her in.

Her eyes drifted around the airport, gazing at people for no longer than a second. Her large, dark green eyes were bright and alert, her skin, as always, was pale and smooth. Her long, chestnut hair was naturally curly, and reached down to her waist. She was chewing on her bottom lip. I frowned, what was the matter with her?

Scarlett's long fingers fiddled franticly with the zip of her navy hoodie, her crossed legs bounced nervously. I couldn't help but look at her tight jeans for longer than I should have. She had always been skinny, her boyish figure was something she hated, but from the age of 13, she had developed a good pair of breasts…. Along with a nice ass.

"Tom?" My whole head snapped to look at her face.

She smiled faintly, it was still beautiful.

"Never mind." She let go of her zip to wave me off. I turned my head back forward, but my eyes never left her.

"Maybe I should die my hair red…" Bill thought out loud.

Scarlett frowned at him, then a smile spread wide across her face.

Gustav snorted, "I think you'd look like a Jelly Tot if you died your hair red." He said, lifting his head from his book. Scar laughed as she checked out Bill's head, probably picturing this. Bill stuck his tongue out at him.

"Depends on what Tom thinks, you know, cause he has a habit of stealing your hair colour." Georg piped sarcastically.

I turned, looking away from Scarlett for the first time, to glare at him.

"Shut up, Hagen. You put more product in your hair than Lady Gaga." I snapped back.

His grin fell from his face,

"Lady Gaga wears wigs, Kaulitz. Shows how much you know." He shot

"Who the fuck are you, her mother?" I shot back.

"STOP fighting!" Bill yelled, rubbing his temples, his face scrunched in pain.

"It's 4:30 in the morning. Scream in my ear one more time and I will not hesitate in killing you." With that threat, the our group turned quiet again. When I looked back to Scarlett, she was smiling at Bill. He smiled back and nodded his head once, before turning back to his coffee. What were they doing?

After 10 more minutes of bored silence, the only sounds being Bill's slurping, Gustav's page turning and Georg's snoring, Scarlett finally had enough. She sprung to her feet so quickly, I was sure she would get head rush. Everyone looked up at her.

"I'm… um…. Going to…. Get something to eat." She explained, scratching her head awkwardly. And with that, she turned for the food court right behind her. I watched her walk away, even after everyone else went back to their business.

**Scarlett**

I had to do something. I couldn't stand another second of that stupid lounge. It was stuffy and loud and boring.

I needed food…….

I glanced around the food court. There were long lines for In-N-Out, Starbuck's, Dunkin' Donuts, Subway and Burger King. All the nice places, I thought, sighing. Beside me was Jamba Juice, with no line at all. Fruit it is!

A short, bored-looking girl with a fiery red pixie cut sat behind the counter, picking at her long blue nails. I smiled, thinking about Bill's strange conversation starter. He always made me feel better, no matter what. She didn't look up when I reached her, didn't even blink her small brown eyes.

"What'll it be?" She asked, her words slurring like she didn't have enough energy to annunciate.

"Ehh….." I looked up at the board. The bright coloured juice names hurt my eyes. "I'll try the Pomegranate Pick-Me-Up, please." Hopefully that will make the morning easier.

She sighed like I'd just asked her to bounce on her head, and sauntered behind the door to make my drink. I made a face behind her back. Stupid girl. I felt my cell vibrate in my back pocket. I slipped it out and took and glanced at the screen… no number. Weird.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Well, well, well. She speaks."

I frowned, " Excuse me?"

"After 6 years of not hearing from you, I just thought you'd lost your voice." I could hear the strange male voice smirk.

"Who is this?" I asked, glancing over at Tobi, my heart racing.

The man laughed. It was cold and sharp.

"No daughter should ask who their father is."

My heart stopped beating altogether.

After a minute of the only sound coming from me being my heart beat, he spoke again, sounding…… troubled. Surely my father would never sound like that.

"You look….. Old. The last time I saw you, you were only 4ft tall." He sighed. " Guess it's been too long, huh?"

I realised I wasn't breathing. I took a mouthful of air,

"Where are you?" I barely croaked. My father was here… in New York….. How did he get my number??

For a few seconds, he didn't say anything. Then,

"Behind you."

My jaw clenched, tears filled my eyes. I didn't want to turn around. I wanted to be sitting back in that stuffy, stupid lounge that a minute ago I hated. Anything but him…..

I spun around quickly, like ripping off a band aid. And there he stood. The man that made my life hell for 13 years, then when I left, didn't stop me or go after me, until now. Aleczandar Rosnovski.

"Scarlett…." He breathed. Dark brown eyes that I vaguely remember ever looking at me, widened, wet with… tears? Impossible.

"Dad." I choked, not really knowing how to greet him. I shuffled my feet and opened my mouth, but nothing came out. How have you been? No, that's weird. It's nice to see you? That's stupid.

My father was some what tall, and unlike me, his skin was swarthy. He had dark hair ,that was slightly more grey than brown, and dark eyes. Although he had always looked more Italian that Polish, I found him to be cutting.. assertive…hard. Never warm or kind or soppy, like now.

My fathers eyes bore into mine, making me feel slightly uncomfortable. He didn't even look at me this much when I was born! Taking a deep breath, his mouth opened again,

"I'm sorry."

Suddenly, this day just got a whole lot weirder. Words I was positive my dad had never uttered in his life, but here he was, in JFK airport, saying them to _me_.

A door behind me was swung open angrily,

"Pomegranate Pick-Me-Up!"

Something told me I was going to need more than fruit to pick me up off the ground.

**10 years ago**

"You know…. I'm thinking about dying my hair red."

The small boy glanced at the girl hopefully. She answered with a smile, then it turned into a giggle. The boy sighed, relived. He thought he would never hear her laugh again!

"Why would you do that?" The little girl asked, wiping the tears from her cheeks.

"Because I like red……" The boy with the black spiky hair turned to the little girl with the long brown hair, that was wild and sticking out in random places, from the lack of sleep she'd had the day before.

"And I want to make you smile. I don't like it when you cry."

The girl smiled again, smaller this time.

"Okay, then I promise I won't cry anymore."

He laughed at her attempt of trying to make a joke. Then, he turned serious again,

"I promise too."

She frowned, " Promise what?"

"Every time you get sad or lonely, as long as we're best friends, I'll be there to make you smile. I promise, Scarlett." He replied, his small face sincere.

"We'll be best friends forever, Bill. That's a lot of work."

"Then that will be my job when I'm older. To make you smile!"

"And it's a very important job, Billy! Take it seriously." She warned.

"I will, Scarlett." The boy smiled.

The girl slipped her hand into his, and that's how they sat, on the roof of the small house, as the sun rose over the water.

To stay like that forever.

**For my only reviewer! Haha. Can I get some more maybe? Please tell me if it was okay!!! **

**Katie**


	4. Chapter 4

Soooooo sorry for not posting last week. Preparation for Easter and all that. This chapter is kind of a writers block chapter. I had NO idea what to write. Sorry again for it's crapness

**Chapter 4**

"**You may delay, but time will not."**

**- Benjamin Franklin**

**Scarlett**

I just stood there. For what seemed like hours, I stood there, doing absolutely nothing. I'm not even sure I was breathing.

"Scarlett…. I'm sorry for everything I've done to you. I have been a horrible father to you. Can you please forgive me?"

For some strange reason, I was thinking about my heart. It was beating very slowly, the sound was ringing in my ears. My slow heartbeat was slow because it was broken. It's been broken since the beginning, but I felt it now, stronger than ever, because my father was tugging on it.

I focused my wide eyes on my father in front of me, and took a deep breath in. I hadn't been breathing.

"Em…I-I…" All I could do was stutter, but my father didn't seem to be out of his choked-up stage yet, so we looked to be on the same boat.

Before I could not say anything else, a large hand was placed on the small of my back. It was warm, as was the musky cologne that I could smell from the tall person behind me.

"Scarlett?" Tom asked, wondering, without saying, what was going on.

My fathers eyes drifted from my face to Tom's, trying to place where he recognised him.

"Thomas?" He asked, frowning. He opened his mouth again, but Tom beat him to it.

"Mr. Rosnovski." He was polite but firm. I could picture the stone look on his face. Never had Tom liked my father. Never had I, come to think of it.

My father looked back down at me,

"How…." His sentence got lost. I spoke in English next, for Tom's sake, as he didn't speak Polish.

"Dad," I started, but paused. Saying that word was like speaking a language I wasn't aware I could.

"That's where I've been this whole time," I shrugged, not knowing how else to put it. "With the Kaulitz's."

He shut his mouth again, digesting this information. Where did he think I went? I left with Poland with nothing, did he think I was on the street?

I had never intended to live with Tom and Bill, it just sort of happened. Before I realised what I was doing, I was on the first plane to Germany, where Simon and Gordon _told_ me I was staying with them. They never adopted me or anything, just raised me, really. They fixed what my parents had done. I'll always love them for that, but I could never officially become their child. Not when I knew my real parents where out there somewhere, hopefully looking for me…. Or waiting for me to come home.

This is what I had always thought, wished. Now that my wish had come true, I didn't know what to do. Celebrate? Cry? Run?

I was lost. The only thing I was certain about was the large, warm hand on the small of my back.

I was certain that without it, I would fall over.

**Tom**

I couldn't believe my eyes when I looked over at Scarlett and saw that piece of scum talking to her. I'd only ever met Aleczandar Rosnovski a few times when we were younger, and every time he had been a dick. I thought we'd finally got rid of him when we took Scarlett in, but now here he was, putting on a fake sorry act with stupid fucking tears and everything!

"You've been… taking care of my daughter." It was more of a statement than a question, but it made me want to smack that shocked look off his face. He treats Scarlett like crap, then shows up wondering where she's been for 6 years?

"What are you doing here?" She asked, anger in her voice. I looked down at her face, she was glaring at him.

Her father did a double take, surprised by her tone,

"What? I -I'm…"

Scarlett's questioning glare stayed put. I grinned, never feeling more proud of her in my entire life.

"I'm serious, dad. What do you want?" She asked through gritted teeth.

Her father tried to compose himself,

"I-I wanted.. Just to see you."

Scarlett gulped, but kept her face steady,

"What took you so long?" She asked.

I could see the tears in her eyes, threatening to spill over. At that moment, I wanted a gun. I wanted Aleczandar Rosnovski dead.

**Scarlett**

The aching started to rip through my chest. He wasn't here for me, he had an evil plan, another motive. He always did.

My father spluttered for a response.

"If you wanted to see me, you would have come a long time ago." I glared, "Don't think for a second I'm stupid enough to believe that you're only here for me, dad. I'm not 8 years old anymore!" I was starting to yell, but I didn't care if the Pope was watching. I wasn't going to let my dad off easy.

"_Flight 410 to Las Vegas now boarding. Flight 410 to Las Vegas now boarding."_

"You have 2 minutes dad. Say what you want to say so bad, and then leave."

"Scarlett…." He paused. Tears started to well up in his eyes, and I felt uncomfortable watching.

"I'm dying."

Tom gasped behind me. I wanted to, but I couldn't make a sound.

Dying.

_Dying._

My father was dying.

**Warsaw, Poland 1998**

"Dad?" The little girl peaked round the large door to see her father sitting behind an even larger desk, his forehead crumpled in concentration and his eyes narrowed with frustration.

"What do you want, Scarlett? I'm very busy!" He replied without looking up from his work.

The little girl edged into the office slowly, fiddling nervously with her frilly dress,

"Can you play with me?" She shut her mouth, wanted to take the question back as soon as it was out.

"I just told you I'm busy! I have no time for your childish games!" He boomed.

"But I-I can't find Mom."

He let out a loud sigh,

"Well I don't know where she is, do I?! Now leave!"

She went to say something else, but stopped. The little girl knew all too well from past experiences, that pushing wouldn't get her anywhere. Whatever she said, the reply was always shouted back to her in anger. She knew it was coming, but asked anyway.

Just to make sure they didn't forget her.

**Possibly more than one reviewer? Or am I asking for too much? I know I get other hits, but no reviews?? Anyways, for the one fan I have! Was it good??**

**Katie**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

"**People are dying, I close my blinds. All that I know is I'm breathing now."**

**- Ingrid Michaelson**

Black.

I don't remember very much. All I know is that was looking at my father, and then I saw black. I don't think I fainted, I think my wish came true. All I wanted was for this to end, to be somewhere else, somewhere my father wasn't.

I got my wish, I thought, as I looked around the white room. I was lying on an uncomfortable bed that was covered with a white sheet, like the ones in hospitals. Was I in hospital??

"Scarlett, your awake." A relived voice came from across the white room, scaring the crap out of me as I tried to focus my eyes.

"Tom, what's going on?" I asked groggily, suddenly feeling very light-headed as I sat up.

"You fainted." Damn it.

Tom walked over and sat on a chair beside the bed, looking concerned.

"Where am I?" I asked, rubbing my sore head.

"A medical room in the airport." Tom replied.

"What?? Oh my God! We missed our flight?" I started to get hysterical.

"Hey, hey, calm down." Tom soothed, reaching his hands out aimlessly in attempt to control me.

"Are you okay?" He asked, when I had settled and was breathing normally.

I was about to reply, when I realised why I fainted. It was all coming back to me. The stuffy lounge, the stupid girl at Jamba Juice, my father appearing out of nowhere.

My_ dying _father……

"Scarlett." Tom whispered, placing a hand on my shoulder.

I looked back up at him, feeling something wet crawl down my cheek. I was crying. Why was I crying? I hate my father. I hate him…… I do.

"What's going on, Tom?" I asked, my voice cracking, "What's happening?"

More tears fell. I wasn't sure what I was referring to when I asked Tom what was going on. Was I asking him why I was in the white room? Why my father was here? What's wrong with him?

"Scar," He rubbed my arm, "He's outside, if you want to see him."

And like that, without even saying, Tom answered the question I was really asking. I didn't even know I was asking it.

I looked at him, the large sunglasses were gone, and his dark brown eyes looked at me with pity. I didn't like that look. I don't like people feeling sorry for me. But for some reason, I couldn't be angry at Tom for pitying me. My head was too cloudy right now to be mad at anyone.

"Scarlett, he wants to see you. He's very worried."

"Do you believe him?" I asked.

Tom sighed and frowned, thinking hard about everything that had happened,

"I don't know, Scar." He finally replied, "I really don't know."

I sighed now, "Me neither."

Tom stood up, "Can you stand?" He asked, extending out his hand to me.

I took his soft hand in mine and stood up, feeling slightly woozy, but not caring.

"I want to talk to him." I decided. Tom looked hesitant, but nodded anyways. He went to walk away,

"But I don't know what to say."

Tom turned back.

**Tom**

"I haven't seen him in years. In my life, I think I've said about three full sentences to him. What do I say?"

Scarlett stood in front of me, in her now creased jeans and fluffy hair. Tears left marks on her pale face. She looked genuinely petrified of what stood outside.

"What do you want to say?" I asked, not really knowing how to answer her question.

She frowned, "I have a lot I want to say to him. Before, out in that food court, I wouldn't of hesitated in saying what I wanted." She paused, "But now…. I can't shout at him. I can't tell him how much of a bad father he was, how I hate him, and want him to leave my life forever."

She sighed and shook her head at the ground, "I just can't."

Now I really didn't know what to say. I knew Scarlett would never be able to say those things to her sick dad. She was too much of a marshmallow for that shit, even if he is a jackass.

"Tell him that."

I had no idea where those words came from, or how they left my mouth, but it got her attention. She lifted her head and looked at me like I had just told her the meaning of life.

"It can't hurt to try, Scar. Tell him how you feel and see how it goes from there." The wisdom kept coming from somewhere in me.

She nodded, "Okay."

I walked forward and rapped my arms around her small frame. I loved hugging her, she was always so warm and her hair smelled of coconut and all the other wild flowers in her shampoo. Scarlett wrapped her arms around my waist and rested her head on my chest. I could tell she was scared.

"Thanks, Tom." She whispered.

I gave her a squeeze before we pulled away,

"Anytime, Scar." I tried for a smile, and she tried back.

**Scarlett**

Tom opened the door and left. I stood there for a while, in the middle of the white room, not really knowing what to do or where to go. Before I did anything, the door opened, and in walked my father.

I took a deep breath, here goes nothing! I thought.

"Scarlett, are you feeling okay?" He asked as the door closed behind him.

And just like Tom said to, I told my father everything. I told him how for years I hated him, I hated him for being a bad father, for never loving me, and when I ran away, for never coming after me. I also told him I was scared, scared of what would happen now that he's back. And I told him, that I didn't want to tell him any of this, but I needed too.

And that I was sorry.

**2009**

"_But Annie…. How can you leave after everything I've-_

Boring.

"_And then you just add the lemon zest, and your-_

Boring.

"_You can now clean anything with this new-_

After 5 minutes of flicking channels, I gave up and turned the Ranger's game back on.

It was the 3rd day in the boys tour and we were in Madrid, Spain. I was lying across the couch in Tom's room watching his TV. Well, the hotel's TV. Gustav and Georg were playing Call Of Duty in the other room and Bill had gone shopping.

He had asked (begged, more like) me to come with him, but I passed. Every time I went shopping with Bill, he would use this opportunity to dress me up like his own personal doll. And I hated it.

I heard a door click open half way through the game, and two seconds later, Tom's head popped round the wall.

"Oh. It's you."

Obviously.

I frowned, " Eh… yeah…. It is me." What was going on?

He walked into the room, revealing his whole self.

"So….umm…. What you doing?" He asked, acting very suspiciously casual.

"Watching TV." My frown stayed. He was up to something.

"Tom, what did you break?" I sighed, rising from the chair.

"What? Nothing! I didn't break anything…."

And then it clicked.

"Ohhhh……. I know what's going on!"

"Shhhhhhh!" Tom whispered/shouting, running over to clamp a hand over my mouth.

"Do you want to be any louder??" He was still doing that weird annoyed whisper thing.

I removed his hand from over my mouth,

"Yes, actually. I would love to be louder and get you into crap with your bum chum." I smiled evilly.

Tom glared, "Funny, Scar. Real funny."

I laughed at my own joked and turned to grab my jacket.

"I'll leave you two love birds alone." I patted Tom's shoulder before walking past him to the door. He winced at my comment. He always did when I referred to his one night stands as anything more.

"Thank you!" Tom whispered/shouted, before the door shut behind me.

**Okay, so I was really hoping to post before next week. And I did it!! :D Hopefully this chapter was better than the last? Worse? Please tell me! I really hate how bunched up it looks like on the page, but trust me, when I write it out I space it LOADS! I dunno why it goes like that, but hopefully it makes sense. Also, when I look on who views my story, I see all these people read it, but only one comments?? (I love your comments, twizzmochaocha, don't get me wrong) But come on, people! I need your criticism! **

**Katie.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you new reviewer! And thanks twizzamochacha for your sources :D I'm counting on you!**

**Chapter 5**

"**Lost and so alone, born but never known, left out on their own. Forgotten Children."**

**- Tokio Hotel**

"I…… I don't know what to say."

No. You never did.

* * *

The sky was a dark purple, streaked red and pink right across. The wind blew gently in my hair, but it was a warm on my skin. I didn't look down, but I could tell the ground was far away from the balcony where I stood.

I couldn't see him, I didn't even hear him approach, but the curl of cigarette smoke that floated past me and up into the night, gave him away.

"What will you do?" He asked softly. His thick German accent was soothing to me, like I didn't know any other.

For a few minutes I didn't reply, just watched the grey smoke swirl around the air. I knew my decision, I knew I would stick by it, no matter what happened.

"Nothing."

That was my decision. About my father, I would do nothing. I would not go out of my way to contact him, I would not worry about him, I would not visit him.

This is what he did to me. I've decided I will do the same.

More silence filled the still night. The only movement was the busy people down below, Tom's cigarette smoke had stopped. And I knew why.

Finally, he spoke,

"Scarlett…."

I shook my head slowly,

"You should really quit, you know."

"What?" Tom asked.

"Smoking. It's bad for you."

And that was the conversation over. Tom knew not to say anything, because he knew I wouldn't listen. I had made up my mind, and that was that.

I felt him leave this time. He turned around and walked back into my hotel room, then out the door. In his wake I was left with cold air smelling like his smoke and musky collonge.

For the first time, in a very long time, I felt alone. I was alone because I didn't have Tom by my side.

He didn't agree with me.

* * *

**2009**

Never had I heard Tom shout so loud. Never had his face been so thunderous, his eyes so filled with rage. My heart was beating faster by the minute, I was just waiting for Tom to pounce, I was sure he would sometime.

"I was there!! I was there for everything important!" Jorg Kaulitz yelled almost as loud as his son, but he wasn't as angry, boy was noone as angry as his son.

"What, so the rest of our lives aren't important?! Right now isn't important!?" Tom growled, that's the only way to discribe it.

We were at Bill and Tom's home in Hamburg, Germany, a place we rarely got to these days. The boys had been recording their album for the past 2 weeks, but today was the guitarists day off, which was why Tom and I were the only ones here……until his father arrived.

"You know that's not what I meant." Jorg's voice was low and threatened, as he pointed a finger at Tom in warning.

"No? Then what did you mean?! What did you mean when you said you would keep in touch, huh?! When you promised Bill you would visit every week? WHAT DID YOU MEAN THEN?!" Tom's voice boomed off the walls, and I saw Jorg jump a little.

"I tried, Tom! I TRIED to be a part of your lives! It's not my fault you wouldn't let me!!" Jorg yelled back, going red in the face.

Tom snorted, his death glare still set in his face,

"I wouldn't let you? I WOULDN'T LET YOU? THAT'S your lame excuse?! You have NO IDEA what I wanted! No fucking idea!!"

I stood there, watching Tom and his father fighting, like a spare idiot.

"Your mother wanted you both to live with her, that was not my decision to make! You think I liked not having my sons with me?! YOU THINK I DIDN'T WANT YOU THERE?!" Jorg thundered.

Tom stared at him like he had three heads,

"Just because we didn't live with you, didn't mean we weren't there! It didn't mean you couldn't see us!! THAT was always your choice to make!"

"Your mother wouldn't allow it! She shut me out from you!! When we divorced, she made sure I couldn't do ANYTHING with you!"

That was it. He had pushed Tom over the edge. He pulled his arm back, and then swung it forward, landing his clenched fist right smack into Jorg's face. The crack of his nose made my stomach turn, and Jorg almost fell back from the blow, but Tom grabbed his shirt, keeping him on his feet. He wasn't finished yet.

Tom went in for another punch, which was when I decided to move my legs and interfere, before he knocked his father out cold.

I pulled on Tom's shirt, trying to pull him off Jorg, but he was too strong. He punched him again, this time in the right eye. Jorg was staggering back, but Tom had a good hold on him.

"Tom, stop!" I yelled, trying to squeeze myself between him and Jorg.

"STOP!" Obviously screaming like him was the only way to get his attention. I wedged myself in front of his father. Tom stopped his arm mid-punch, looking down at me.

"Tom, stop it." I said, more gently now, to calm him down.

He looked at my face, and his eyes cleared from the cloud of anger they had before.

"Please?" I reached out and placed my hand over his fist, slowly guiding it back down to his side.

Tom let go of his father's shirt, and Jorg stumbled, but kept standing. Both their breathing was rough, Tom's chest heaving in and out.

I turned to look at Jorg Kaulitz, he was looking at me, for the first time since he'd arrived. He face was old, but I could see so much Tom and Bill in him. Blood poured from his nose, his right eye was half-closed and starting to swell.

"I think you'd better go." I said clearly.

Jorg continued to look at me, his mouth open, one eye wide, but I couldn't read his face. Then, he turned and walked out. Not looking back up at Tom.

Never had Tom liked his father.

I turned back to him, and reached up to wrap my arms around his neck. Tom immediately wrapped his around my waist, and rested his head on my shoulder. Like that we stayed for a while, as Tom cried his heart out.

Never had I, come to think of it.

* * *

"Lord, may you show mercy onto the soul of this woman. May you, and all the faithfully departed, bring her into your light of ever-lasting life."

The Priest is loud, I thought, as I stared at the large stone grave in front of me. That was the only thought in my head, as the cold winter wind whipped in my hair and chilled the back of my neck. The cemetery was getting dark, and the large trees overhead didn't help.

She wasn't even Catholic, another thought floating in my head, as I took in the old Priest, wearing his robe and holding a black bible in his hands. He was standing in front of her coffin, making the sign of the cross with his hands over it.

I lowered my eyes back to the original staring position of the stone. Encarved was,

**Izobel Rosnovski**

**1963 - 2010**

**Odpoczynek w pokoju**

"Lord!" The loud Priest boomed, "We ask you to bless her soul, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen."

With those last words, they lowered my mother into the ground.

I watching, thinking nothing.

* * *

**Okay! I'm going to be totally honest with you guys! I have NO idea where I'm going with this whole 'father' situation. I mean seriously, I am having a writers block from Hell! I feel stupid for bringing her dad into this, because now he's annoying me and I don't know what to do with him! ****L**

**Anyways! I hope you like it! My chapters are very short, aren't they? :/**

**Opps.**

**Katie.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys! Thanks SO much for all your reviews! You actually have no idea how happy they make me ****J And thanks for all your ideas, new reviewers! Also, hello my first source. Yay! Haha.**

**Chapter 7**

"**Everything you can imagine is real."**

**- Pablo Picasso**

"_Scarlett."_

They lowered it into the ground.

"_Scarlett."_

I watched the wooden box go down…. Down…

"_Scarlett."_

….until I could see it no longer.

"_Scarlett!"_

My body lurched forward, like when you throw up. I felt like I was about to, as I tried to catch my hard breath and focus my blurry eyes on my surroundings.

My heart was jumping out from under my tee shirt, and my whole body shook as I looked around. I was sitting up in a large bed, still fully dressed in clothes I recognised from the day before. I'm in a hotel, I thought.

It was all a dream…..

* * *

"Hey."

I turned around to the timid voice,

"Hey." I replied, putting the clothes I had been folding down on my bed.

"What's up?" I asked, when Tom hadn't said anything.

He was standing across the room, his hands in his pockets, looking everywhere but my face. I had replayed over last night a million times in my head since waking up. Tom didn't agree with my decision to not contact my father, and he was obviously going to hang it over my head.

"Bill's getting ready, and Georg and Gustav have gone out shopping, so I….."

Thought I'd come see you.

I nodded, "Oh… cool. Well, um…" I frowned, not knowing what to say. I hated this awkward 'I can't finish a sentence' thing.

"I actually wanted to talk to you." I concluded, hoping to sound confident.

Tom snapped his head up, looking at me for the first time,

"About what?"

You know what.

"Last night."

His eyes dropped back down to the floor, and he pretended to be examining his shoe. What was the matter with him? He was never like this with me.

"Oh."

I sighed, turning to shove all my folded clothes into my suitcase,

"It's not a big deal, Tom!" I called out, keeping my back turned, "It's what I want to do, okay? Can't you just grin and bear it? The last thing I want out of all this is for you to be awkward with me."

I spun around, planning on looking him straight in the eye, only to see his broad chest. I looked up to his face, he standing just inches away from me, looking down with an expression I couldn't understand.

"I'm sorry." His brows were furrowed, his voice was sincere and apologetic. Almost……sad.

"I promised myself I would be there for you, no matter what. I would do anything you wanted, help in any way I could. All I've done is made things worse…"

I stared, dumbfounded, as Tom's speech hung in the air. His head lowered in shame, I wanted to hug him tight and tell him it was okay.

"You haven't." I finally replied, my voice sounding small.

He looked up at my face.

"You've been there for me since he showed up," I tried a small smile, "I don't want you to worry about me, Tom. I'll be fine."

* * *

"I don't want you to worry about me, Tom…."

If only she knew that were impossible.

* * *

"_AHHHHHHHHHH!"_

The girl on the in the movie screamed higher and louder than Bill. Which is saying something. Scar, who was curled up in a ball beside me, gave a weak yelp from the blanket she hid behind.

"I can't believe you're making me watch this!" Her small voice scolded me.

I turned to look at her, and laughed. Her long legs were pulled up against her chest, covered in a thin blanket, and she held a pillow up in front of her face.

"You're not even watching it! I laughed.

She turned to glare at me. It was visible, even in the dark room.

"_She's being dragged by a demon into hell." _She hissed through gritted teeth.

"That's what's so good about it!" I said in a 'duh' tone.

Scarlett rolled her green eyes, and returned to watching her pillow.

I turned back to the screen, but I couldn't pay attention any more. I was too aware of Scarlett, how her button nose crinkled when a horrible noise came from the movie, how every time she peaked around the pillow, she winced, and instantly regretted it. How her legs were leaning against mine, her left arm stuck to my side.

I was too aware of how much I wanted her……_needed_ her.

I was too aware I was going crazy.

* * *

**Scarlett**

"Tom. Em…can I talk to you?"

Tom turned around,

"Of course. What's up?" He asked, setting his guitar down.

When he did that, he knew it was serious. I bit my lip,

"I had a dream." I felt stupid before I'd even started….

Tom frowned, "About what?"

I pushed my hair out of my eyes,

"My mom." My voice was quiet. I couldn't will it to be stronger.

Tom stayed quiet, waiting for me to go on. I relayed the dream back in my head, as clear as the night I'd had it.

"She was dead." I stared down at my hands. "It was her funeral."

Silent seconds ticked by into minutes. I raised my head to look at Tom,

"What if it was real?" I asked, my voice still weak. I hated that.

"What do you mean?" Tom asked.

I shook my head, "What if she's really dead? What if it's already happened?"

I'm not sure why, but this thought scared me. As much as I hated my mother, I couldn't imagine her dead. I couldn't imagine not being at her funeral.

"Scarlett." Tom's husky voice snapped me out of my thoughts,

"If you want to find out, you know how to."

And I did……oh I did.

* * *

**Review make me happy!!!**

**Katie**


	8. Chapter 8

**MUST READ:**

Okay yeah, sorry about the sign, but there's a lot I gotta say before going on. I am SORRY SORRY SORRY for not posting earlier! Here's my excuse: I had the chapter almost done on my laptop when it decided to go crazy and break down L So yeah, it's not working, I lost my chapter, and I officially hate technology. That plus it's crazy test time and I'm kinda freaking out! Anyways! I want to thank EVERYONE for your awesome reviews, you guys have no idea how happy they make me!!! J And I'm sorry again that I'm confusing people, I promise to try and work on that! To finish I want to say Hello to all my new reviewers and I'm sooooo happy you guys like it so far! Also, I would like to make a little deal with you guys?? You give me at least 5, yes, 5 reviews to this chapter, and I promise to make the next one long and luscious! Is it a deal? :D

**Chapter 8**

"**The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else."**

**- Anonymous**

**Scarlett**

In front of me, stood a large door. It was very old. It was made of dark wood, and had a gold knocker right in the middle.

It was massive.

I had been staring up at this door for at least an hour, ringing my sweaty hands on the hem of my white vest and biting the top layer off my bottom lip. The sun was beating down on the exposed skin on my legs and arms. It was the middle of summer, so I was clad in shorts and flip flops, but it felt too heavy.

Although I hadn't taken my eyes off the door, I could tell dark clouds were forming above me, as a warm wind whipped in my loose hair and the trees that surrounded the mansion I stood in front of.

A storm was coming, I thought.

I lifted my shaking hand to the knocker, and wrapped the door. Just as I did, it opened. The owner of the house stood behind the door, staring at me. I stared back.

Then the storm hit.

**Scarlett**

"Oh my God! Georg! Did you just put orange juice in your cereal?!" I heard Bill shriek in disgust.

I shook my head and laughed at their breakfast antics, but didn't look up from the guitar I had been strumming the whole morning. I hadn't written a song since we'd started the tour, and when I tried, my head would start to hurt and the song would be so bad, I wouldn't even show them to Tom.

In case you were wondering, I'm not just tagging along this tour for fun, I'm the band's supporting act. I may not be as big as Tokio Hotel, but I have albums that have done quite well, as well as fans all over the world. This, however, wont be the case if I can't write one stupid song.

I sighed loudly, wanting to yank hard on the strings of my guitar, but settled for biting my lip instead. I shook my leg, things I often did when I was nervous or annoyed.

"What's up Buttercup?" Tom asked, strolling into the room with the cheesiest grin on his face.

"Nothing." I snapped, barely opening my teeth. He had said three words, and already his good mood was annoying.

He flopped down beside me, his grin gone.

"Your really gonna play that game with me?" He asked, staring at me with those eyes that would make a rock squirm.

"What game?" I kept my frown, although I knew what he meant.

"Your playing it!" He announced, throwing his hands up in the air, and nearly spilling his coffee everywhere.

I rolled my eyes, it was too early in the morning for confrontation.

"I can't write a song." I muttered under my breath, annoyed he made me admit it.

Tom sighed, softer this time. I was surprised he even heard me over the other guys.

"Neither can I, but you don't see me denting a hole in my guitar." He stated, gently prying my white fingers from around the neck of my guitar.

I hadn't realised I'd been squeezing it that hard, but my fingers ached when I let go. I flexed them, and used my other hand to set the guitar down.

"Why do you think your not writing?" Tom asked, taking a sip of his coffee.

I shrugged, "I'm shit?"

Tom chuckled and rolled his eyes,

"Okay…besides that!"

I laughed, causing Tom to do the same. He'd made me feel better already, about a situation I would never laugh at. I knew why I couldn't write, and I was pretty sure Tom knew too. It was because my mind was blocked, clouded over with pain and confusion. But one thing I couldn't understand, doesn't that sort of thing make great songs?

I stopped laughing, feeling even more depressed than before Tom walked in.

"So…."

I snapped my head to the side, being pulled out of my daydream, to see Tom fiddling with his coffee cup. I knew what he was going to ask, but he had to say it first.

"Are you gonna go….talk to him?" He asked awkwardly.

"I-I suppose." I didn't mean to stutter, but my voice was shaky. It was the only solution. I had to know about my mother.

Tom's dark eyes reached my face,

"I'll come with you," He almost whispered,

"If you need me."

**Tom 2005**

I was sitting on my bed, doing homework that I didn't understand, when my bedroom door burst open suddenly. Scarlett strolled in like she owned the place.

And she could've……

Scar stood in front of my bed, clad in a tight purple dress that stopped in the middle of her thighs, and ankle breaking black stilettos.

I dropped my mouth in awe. She looked amazing.

"What'd you think?" She asked, a sly grin on her face.

"Um…well…I-I…" Was my smart reply. I couldn't keep my wide eyes off her, her flowing chocolate hair that framed her face perfectly, or the dress that clung to her long body like a rubber glove.

I licked my lips, my heart beating a million times a minute, as I couldn't help but let my mind wonder…..

Scarlett frowned when I couldn't produce a sentence,

"Is it that bad?" She asked, letting her arms flop to her sides.

"No, no!" I replied a little too quickly,

"I mean, you know, it's looks… great. Yeah." I tried to redeem myself.

Scarlett's face softened, "Cool! Bill told me I had to wear it, so…"

I smiled as she walked further into my room, taking a seat on my computer chair, and picking up the guitar that sat beside the table. She did this every time she walked in.

"So! You… excited…for tonight?" I asked casually, trying not to break the pencil I was holding.

She bit her lip, strumming my guitar quietly,

"Sure. I can't wait."

I frowned, "What's wrong?"

Scarlett was going out on a date with her boyfriend, _Chris_. God, I hated that boy.

"Nothing." She shook her head, still staring at my guitar.

Of course Scar had had boyfriends before, and of course, I hated them all. She attracted everyone, but it always seemed to be the idiots that stuck. Seeing her with other boys killed me. Holding their hands, hugging them, kissing them, I loathed every one of them, because they would always end up breaking her heart, and I would end up breaking their noses. But mostly I hated them because I wanted to _be_ them.

Oh, how I wanted to be them.

Scarlett let out a deep sigh and set my guitar back in it's place. Something was wrong with her, but I couldn't understand what. She loved Chris, she loved going out with him.

I tightened my grip on my pencil again.

"Tom?" I snapped my eyes back to Scarlett's face. She looked scared.

"If I tell you something, you promise you wont freak out?" She asked, biting her lip.

My frown deepened. Usually when Scarlett said this, I ended up freaking out. We both knew I would.

"What is it?" I asked, not bothering to promise this time.

"Well….. I….it's just….. Chris and I had something planned for tonight, but I-I don't know what to do about it, and I, well, I just wanted to tell you." She stumbled over her words, before giving up,

"Never mind! It was stupid!" She shook her head, leaping up from the chair and heading for my door.

"Wait!" I jumped from my bed, grabbing her wrist before she could leave.

"Tell me, Scar." I soothed. Never had she not wanted to tell me something.

She turned around to face me, worry in her big green eyes, a frown on her beautiful face,

"Chris and I were going to… have sex…tonight. For the first time."

On the outside, I froze. On the inside, I freaked out.

**Scarlett 2005**

"Chris and I were going to….have sex…tonight. For the first time."

I felt sick just telling him. I didn't want to do it with Chris, I didn't want to do it with anyone! Except Tom, maybe……..

I didn't want any other boy. Only Tom.

But he would never know that.

Tom's face froze, his jaw clenched and his eyes widened. He didn't say anything.

He had never liked any of my boyfriends. He always made that very clear. But I couldn't understand why. It wasn't like he wanted to be my boyfriend…..

Oh, how I wanted him to be.

**Scarlett**

"Hello?"

"…….Hey…..dad. It's Scarlett…..em…..can we talk?"

We decided to meet up at a café just down the street from the hotel he was staying in. I didn't really want to talk to him, and I definitely didn't want to talk to him about my mother, but I knew I would have to do it some day. And what better day than today……

My birthday.

**Again: I'M SORRY! For taking soooo long! I'll definitely try and get the next one out faster! And hopefully it will be better as well! Please tell me what you thought, and remember, FIVE reviews! Okay?**

**Katie**


	9. Chapter 9

Hey guys! Would've updated sooner, but, it took a while to get 5 reviews! Now, I want another 5 this time, please! :D Thank you guys so much, I'm very glad you like it!

"**Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy."**

**- H.L Mencken**

Scarlett

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR SCARLETT HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUUUUUU!"

My body bounced on top of my bed, and my eyes shot open to see Tom, Bill, Gustav and Georg jumping above me, large smiles on all their faces.

I laughed as my body was flung around,

"You guys! Stop it! I'm gonna throw up!" I giggled.

They slowed their bounces, and Georg dived down beside me,

"Happy birthday, Scarlett!" He grinned, producing a large box that was wrapped in pink and purple paper, with a large pink bow at the top.

"Oh wow, Georg! You didn't have to get me anything!" I couldn't help but smile through my lie, I loved presents!

He waved me off with a flick of his wrist, "Of course I did! Tom made me!"

I laughed as Tom glared at him from across the bed.

"Nah I'm just kidding, it's your birthday! I had to get you something!"

I felt tears in my eyes. I cried at the most stupid things!

"Thank you, sweetie!" I exclaimed, wrapping one arm around Georg's neck, while holding onto my present with the other.

Georg hugged me back, "Don't mention it! Just hurry up and open it!"

I laughed and pulled away from him, ripping apart my pretty box. Inside was a large, cream bear, with a small brown nose and matching paws, it was wearing a tiny leather jacket. Small dark sunglasses covered its eyes.

"Oh wow, Georg, you gave her your boyfriend." Tom retorted from the bottom of the bed.

"Shut up, Kaulitz!" Georg yelled, lifting one of my pillows and firing it at Tom's face.

We laughed when the pillow knocked the sunglasses off his face, revealing a very angry Tom.

"I thought you might like the Rockstar bear." Georg turned back to me, oblivious of the death glares he was getting.

I laughed and lifted it out of the box, it was fluffy and cuddly when I gave it a big hug,

"It's so cute! I love it!"

The boys laughed at my childish grin.

"My turn! My turn!" Bill yelled, shoving Georg out of his way, and thrusting a red and gold gift bag in my face.

"Thanks, Bill." I laughed, taking the bag off him. Inside underneath all the red paper, were a pair of killer black Louboutin heels, with the signature red under sole, and silver studs all over.

"Oh my God…" I breathed, my eyes popping at the glorious shoes before me.

The boys laughed,

"I knew you would love them! I saw them in the shop and I just HAD to get them!" Bill grinned at his success. I thanked him again and gave him one last hug, before Gustav sat down beside me with a shy smile and a long, rectangular white box.

He handed it to me with a 'Happy Birthday, Scarlett' and a warm hug. I thanked him and opened the strange package, to see a pair of drumsticks, with my name engraved in black on each of them.

"Oh, wow!" I gasped, lifting them out to examine them further.

"I, well, I don't really know what to buy women, but when I saw you playing the drums the other day, I thought you might like your own sticks." Gustav smiled. He was such a cutie!

"I love them! Thank you, Gustav." I beamed, giving him another hug.

"Well!" Bill boomed, clapping his hands together, "Now that present time is over, it's time for us to make your breakfast! Or should I say, order your breakfast…. From room service."

I laughed as Bill, Georg and Gustav jumped from my bed and shoved out the door. I looked down at my presents that covered my legs, and smiled. The guys were awesome! I had forgotten Tom hadn't left until he cleared his throat. I looked up into his warm brown eyes, and smiled.

"Happy Birthday, Scar." He smiled back.

I frowned, "Dude, where's my present?" I joked, nudging him in the shoulder.

Tom laughed, " Be patient, young cub, you'll get your present soon enough." He grinned evilly, and my smile disappeared. I knew that evil little face all too well.

"What are you planning?" I asked, sounding like a strict mother.

"I'm not _planning _anything!" Tom exclaimed, sounding horrified at my accusation, while mockingly putting his hand to his heart. I frowned at him, letting him know I wasn't fooled.

His dropped his act, then grinned,

"It's already planned!" He said cheekily, jumping from my bed and running out the door before I could say a word. I rolled my eyes at his cute childishness, and walked into the bathroom to wash and dress.

The guys had made my 18th birthday morning happy, but sadly I had some business to do that was less than enjoyable. With people that hadn't spent a birthday with me in 10 years. And had celebrated none before that.

Tom 2006

"Happy birthday! Happy birthday! Happy birthday!"

My tired eyes shot open to see a small, heart shaped face just two inches away from mine,

"Happy birthday!" The smiling face exclaimed, planting a sweet kiss on my forehead and jumping up on my bed like a 5 year old.

I turned over on my back to look up at Scarlett, who was jumping up on either sides of my legs, her long brown hair flying around her face, her bright smile stretching to the tips of her shining eyes. She was beautiful. My hand ached to reach out and grab her.

And this time, my hands won.

I wrapped them around her small waist and pulled, she fell down beside me with a weak yelp. She continued to giggle, pushing a stray strand of hair out of her face,

"What was that for?" She asked, resting her hands on my chest, while mine stayed glued to her sides.

"No reason, just wanted the jumping to stop." I joked, catching her infectious grin.

"Okay. Did I forget to say Happy Birthday?" She mocked a frown.

I laughed, " No, I think you remembered that!" But then I realised that not only was it my birthday, but it was also my twins, "Did you forget to say it to Bill?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

"No, I went into him and he threw a hairbrush at me." She stated, pouting her pretty pink lips.

I laughed, of course Bill wasn't a morning person! Well, neither was I, but with the most beautiful girl in the world lying across my chest, how could I not be awake?

"Wait!" I exclaimed, frowning, "You went into Bill before me?" I asked, looking at her suspiciously.

"Wellll….. Yeah…..kindaaa…. But only because I knew he would kick me out!" She laughed. I laughed with her, and it sounded like perfect music.

"Soooo….. I don't suppose you want your present, now?" Scarlett's dark green eyes glittered with excitement. Now I was really awake!

"Yeah!" I yelled, my grin splitting my face. Scarlett laughed and jumped down from my bed. I sat up and watched her duck out of my room, only to return a second later with a small black box.

For the past week I had tried everything to get Scar to tell me what my present was, but she never budged. Although, when Bill asked what his was, she was more than happy to tell him it was Nena concert tickets! How unfair was that?

Scarlett sat across from me on her knees, the small box resting in her palm. A look of pure seriousness washed over her face. I instantly frowned, all ideas of what she could have gotten me were dropped. This was obviously a serious present.

"When I left Poland, I didn't take very much with me. I just wanted to get out as fast as I could." Scarlett shrugged, her green eyes falling down to the package in her hand, "But I took this. It's my favourite possession."

But before I could interrupt, about to say that I couldn't take it from her, she raised her head to trap me in her beautiful, broken face,

"And you're my favourite person."

She took my heavy hand in her small, smooth one, and placed the small black box in my palm, before wrapping my fingers around it, closing her eyes, and pressing her full, pink lips to them. My heart stopped as electric shot from the tingling spot on my skin where her lips had been to the rest of my body.

I tried to close my mouth and find my breath, as Scarlett looked up at me with a warm smile, before walking out of my room, leaving her sweet sent of wild flowers and vanilla to surround me. I looked down at the small, black box, running my hand over it's cold, smooth exterior. What was that?

_Glass?_

My hands became alert at the fragileness of this box, not to mention that it was Scar's most prized possession, and if I were to break it, I would be a dead man.

"Hey! Tom!"

My head snapped up to see a very tired looking Bill standing in my doorway,

"Scarlett made breakfast, come and get some." He motion for me to follow him, but I told him I'd be down in a minute.

Finally, my fingers slipped under the lid of the black box. My heart raced under my shirt. Scarlett had never shown me, never mind told me about this box, yet it seemed to mean so much to her. Why did she keep it a secret? And why was she giving it to me?

The lid flipped open with a 'click' to reveal a small, gold heart. It edges were ragged, and it was clearly an antique, but it was beautiful.

For my 16th birthday, Scarlett gave me her heart. And I planned to protect that heart with everything I had.

Scarlett

I fiddled with the radio in my car, cursing stupid technology when it failed to change to the station I wanted. I gave it one last 'smack' before the light turned green and I sped off down towards the highway. I was alone, after finally convincing Tom I would survive in a crowded café with my father for a quick half an hour while I got my information. He wasn't happy about letting me go, but I assured him I would call him if anything happened, and sealed that promise with a hug. He was able to crack a smile then.

Today I was meeting with my father, to ask about my mother. That shouldn't be weird… but it is. Despite his best efforts to win me over, I still didn't trust my father, but him coming back into my life made me curious. Clearly he hadn't forgotten all about me, but had my mother? Did she know where I was? Did she care? Was she even alive?

I hated knowing nothing.

I let out a loud sign of frustration as I turned off at the sign for the Hilton, where my father was staying. I had agreed to talk with him in the café across the street from the hotel to have some breakfast, but he was unaware of what I was really there for.

I parked close to the café, keeping my large black car in safe reach in case a quick getway was necessary. I pushed my black ray bans from my eyes to the top of my head as I grabbed my purse from the front seat and climbed out of my car.

My father stood outside the café, with his hands in the pockets of his long, black pants. He was wearing shiny black dress shoes, and a crisp blue shirt, cleaned and ironed to perfection. His black curly hair was slicked back, giving a clear view of his dark skin and large brown eyes. This was casual for him.

He glanced around him, and when his eyes caught me, his face broke into a grin, revealing a row of straight, white teeth, that gleamed in the sun. His grin caused his eyes to wrinkle at the sides, and laugh lines to form at the sides of his mouth. His raised a hand out of his pocket to wave at me. I gave him a feeble smile and an awkward lift of my hand as I approached him.

I saw as many women walked past and stared at my father, clearly in awe at his appearance, and when I reached him, and we said our hellos, I realised why. He was very hansome. I hadn't remembered my father as hansome, he was always frowning, with a perminant crease in his forehead. I remembered the way his nostrils flared and he gritted his teeth when something went wrong, and he clenched his fists until his knuckles turned white and the vains in his arms were visable.

That to me, was not hansome. But this calm, friendly looking man in front of me was. And as he ushered me inside the café and towards a table at the back, chatting away about how he had lunch in here yesterday and when the waitress was giving him his delicious BLT sandwich, a small boy walked in to ask for 2 coffee's to go, and a crowd of teenage girls started screaming and chased him out. I wasn't particularly amused, because of all the things in the world to talk about, my father gossips about his incounter with Justin Bieber!

"Em…. I forget his name. The waitress told me it yesterday. Was is Jason? Jackson?" He scratched his head, rhyming off more names that started with J.

"I think you mean Justin Bieber." I first sentence I'd said to him, and I was already annoyed.

"Ahh, yes!" He snapped his fingers, "That was it! God, those girls were going crazy, but luckily the kid was pretty fast -

"Dad! Could we not talk about Justin? I was hoping we could descuss something more important." I asked, trying to keep polite, as a tall, teenage boy walked over to take our order.

I opened the menu quickly and stated the first thing I saw, 'I'll have the pancakes, please." I gave him a quick smile and the menu. I wasn't hungry, because I'd had breakfast with the guys earlier, but I didn't want to give my dad conversation. I looked around the pretty café, and noticed a group of teenage girls looking over, whispering. I turned away swiftly, letting my hair fall across my face to hide it from them.

Oh great, they recognised me! I thought. Of all times!

They weren't too far away from our table, and could probably hear us, so I decided to speak in Polish, and hope none of them were fluent.

My father told the waiter his order of bacon and eggs, and handed him his menu, before turning back to me. His face was open and friendly, and he stared into my eyes. I let mine drop to the table where my hands were fidgetting with my phone. I still couldn't look him straight in the eye. It was creepy.

"So, how have you been, Scarlett? We haven't talked since….well…. Since the, um, airport…uhh…incident."

My mind reeled back to when we met at the airport in New York. My father told me he was dying, and I fainted.

My cheeks turned red at the thought of it.

"Um, yeah, I'm good." I nodded, biting furiously at my bottom lip, "How-how are you?" I asked, although that wasn't the right question.

The right question was-

"It's cancer." My father replied easily.

My stomach churned and flipped at the word. My eyebrows creased until it hurt, and tears stung my eyes.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, not able to say anything else.

My father sighed, "Let's not talk about that, huh? Let's talk about something else!" He put on a smile and a fake 'everything's happy' voice.

I have to say it, just say it. No cutting corners, just say it.

_Say it._

"I actually came here to talk about my mother." I raised my head to look my father in the face, and he was as pale as I was human. But I wasn't finished yet.

"I need you to tell me the truth, dad. I need to you tell me what you know about her, and I need you to be honest with me. I need to know about my mother."

Short, shallow breaths were coming from my fathers slack mouth. He hadn't blinked in a while, and just when I was about to ask him if he was alright, he spoke,

"She knows about you."

I frowned, confused. She knew about me?

"What do you mean?" I asked, leaning foreward on the table.

"She knows that you've been living with the Kaulitz's, that's you've been doing music, she knows that your touring with them, and that you're here."

The air caught in my throat,

"She-she knows _what_?" I choked on the words.

She knew I was _here. _She was in Vegas.

"W-W-What…." I stuttered and stopped, my mind raced a thousand times a minute. How many times had I wondered where she was, how many times had I been to Las Vegas when the boys had a concert here?

How many times had she known I was here?

"She lives here." My fathers voice sounded distant. "Scarlett."

I looked up at him, my mouth open and my eyes still wide.

"Your mother and I devorced a short time after you left. She moved here, where she found a new man, who has recently become her husband. They have a child together, another girl. She seems to be very happy… different."

He fired a surprise at me, one after the other, and I felt like throwing up.

She was married. She had another kid. I had a sister-in-law.

All I wanted to know was if she was alive or not, if my dream had been real. But it hadn't, it couldn't of been further from reality!

_Married._

_Sister._

Tom

I was starting to get worried about Scarlett. She had been gone for over an hour, and hadn't called or text anyone. I've never trusted Aleczandar Rosnovski, and I was prepared to chop my nuts off before letting Scarlett anywhere near him alone, but she begged, and promised she'd be alright. And it was very hard to win with her. So I let her go…. Alone….

And now I was sitting in her empty hotel room, holding her heart, and praying that the real one doesn't break.

Tom 2004

Another strangled sob ripped from the angel's throat, and more tears fell from her beautiful face. I tried to comfort her, soothe her in whatever way I could, but the damage was done.

I was lying on Scarlett's bed, holding her to me with everything I had. Her small, warm body rested on mine as she cried her heart out on my chest. My hand rubbed her back, keeping her close. The other smoothed at her hair, occasionally wiping the tears from her pale cheeks. I kissed her head, repeating over and over again that it would be alright, everything would be alright.

But it wouldn't.

Scarlett had lost the only family member that had ever loved her, ever treated her right. And with no one else, she fell apart in my arms. She broke down, and I tried my hardest to fix her, but I don't think I can. Not this time.

A tear slipped from my eye, and rolled silently down my cheek. I cried for Aleczandar Rosnovski, who passed away from cancer only yesterday. I cried for his granddaughter, who without him, was a family of 1.

I tried to make this chapter as long as I could, but I'm not sure I'm happy about the content. I don't think it's very good L Sorry. Also, sorry about Scarlett's age, it keeps jumping around from 18 to 19, but I just want to clear everything up by saying she turned 18 on this birthday, okay? And sorry if my spellings wrong, but it 5 in the morning, and I couldn't be bothered to check it. Sorry.

Katie


	10. Chapter 10

Oh. My. God. I have not updated this in MONTHS, I know! But I had completely forgotten about it, and only remembered yesterday. Are you guys still there? Haha.

**Scarlett - 6 months ago**

When I was six, my mother bought me a doll. It had brown ringlet curls, and large, shiny green eyes, surrounded by long, black lashes. It's lips were a deep red, and the cheeks were tinted pink. It wore a white lace dress, and black patient shoes over white frilly socks.

It was my favourite thing in the world, until one fateful day when I was 8, and Jack Kowalski flushed it down the toilet in school.

I sat in my mother's large house, on her large couch, in her large living room, and thought about my doll. I looked down at my mothers daughter, my half-sister, and thought about my doll.

She looked just like her.

**Present Day**

"Hello America and welcome to the Teen Choice Awards 2011!"

The crowd went wild.

"I am here to host the show tonight and boy do we have a _show_ for you guys! With appearances from Selena Gomez, Black Eyed Peas, Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber!"

The crowd went wild again.

"Yes sir tonight is going to be crazy! So do not turn this channel over if you want to catch all the awards and performances from are celebrities, including our special guest Miss Kim Kardashian!"

Scarlett gave the crowd a huge, beaming smile.

I could tell, even through my TV screen, that is was fake.

I realise how short this chapter is (I probably can't even call it a chapter) but I just want to see if I still have my readers? Cause I do love this story, and I hate not finishing things. Comments? : )

Katie


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey guys, okay, I gotta be quick because I want to post this tonight but I only have HALF AN HOUR :O so yeah, thanks for your comments and I'm going to try and not confuse you, okay? I'll put a flashback at the start or end of a chapter, cause I love my flashbacks too much -_- and I can't get rid of them, sorry!**

"**I am a protector. I will never leave you"**

**- Unknown**

Present Day

"Hey baby, you awake?" His warm breath tickled my neck, I shivered.

"Yeah." I said quickly, jumping up from the hotel bed and putting my vest and underwear on.

"What's wrong?" The sleazy male voice behind me asked.

"Nothing." I shook my head, but everything was wrong. I stank of vodka and the sleazy man's cigars. I haven't seen my best friend in 2 months. I now have sex with random guys out of boredom. I hate my life.

Last night was the MTV movie awards, and I picked up the first guy I saw, who was a douche bag. I badly needed a shower and him out of my bed, but just as I was about to turn around and tell him, there was a knock on the door.

I sighed, "Put some clothes on." I frowned at his naked form on my bed, and walked to open the door.

It was the last person on earth I thought it would be. It was someone who was supposed to be in Germany recording an album.

It was my best friend.

"Tom?" I yelled, my eyes wide with horror.

Tom's bright smile faded when he looked down to see my black underwear. He's cheeks flushed red.

"Ehh.. Hey Scar. Do you always answer your door in-

He didn't finish his sentence, his eyes had roamed over my head, and found the man in my bed. My heart raced and Tom's eyes turned black, his jaw hardened and he dropped his bag on the floor.

"Tom I-

He quickly shoved me to the side and ran into the room,

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" He yelled at the man.

"Woah dude, what's your problem, man?" He yelled back, finally covering himself up.

"You're my problem, _man_. Did you touch her?" Tom screamed, pointing to me.

I couldn't believe my eyes.

"Of course I did, we had sex."

The man was an idiot.

Tom launched at him as soon as the words left his mouth. He punched him in the face repeatedly, and I ran over hurriedly to stop him before he killed him.

"Tom!" I yelled, tugging on his arm helplessly. It was useless, he was too strong and too angry.

"Tom, stop, please!" I screamed, practically jumping on his back.

It was all deja-vu

2005

"Tom?" Her voice was raspy, like she'd been crying.

"Scar? What's the matter?" My heart began to race.

"I-I'm in trouble, Tom.."

I jumped off my seat on the couch, carelessly throwing my guitar down,

"Where are you? What's going on?" I quickly threw the words together, grabbing my jacket and heading for the door.

Scarlett had left for her date with _Chris _an hour ago. I knew I shouldn't of trusted that guy. My blood boiled at the thought of him hurting her.

"I-I don't know. I think I'm at the beach. He-he left and I… I'm scared, Tomi." She was whispering, her voice was small and I could barely hear her. I cursed myself and I ran down the street.

"Don't worry, Scar. I'm coming for you. Just stay on the phone, okay?"

"Okay." She sniffed.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" I asked, trying my hardest to remain calm. All I really wanted to do was kill everyone around me.

I could hear her sniff again,

"He wouldn't tell me where he was taking me and…and he was trying to...and.. and I told him to stop." She was getting worked up.

I ran around a corner, it was dark, but I could see the beach.

"Did he hurt you?" I asked through gritted teeth.

She was silent for a moment, all I could hear were the waves crashing, and my heart beating quickly.

"I'm fine."

It was a lie.

I found her curled up in the sand, her clothes were ripped, her eyes were frightened, she was shaking.

I promised myself this would never happen again. For as long as she lived.

**Sorry its so short! But I decided I'll post short chapters regularly, rather than long chapters every month! Haha.**

**Please review!**

**Katie**


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